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1. INTRO
1. INTRO | 2. THE ARRIVAL | 3. FRESHEST OTONDO | 4. CAMP CALVARY | 5. THE SHOCK |
6. CONFUSION | 7. DISCOVERY BEGINS | 8. EXPLOSIVES
Few minutes after I took my seat in the bus heading to the NYSC orientation camp, she came on board...she sat just next. I didn't turn to look at her because I was busy taking a 'selfie'.
Then she chuckled.
I turned to look at her. I wondered whether she found my taking a 'selfie' in a public transport funny as our eyes met.
"Good morning dear" she said to me, her voice had that note of maturity.
"Same here dear" I replied.
I couldn't hold it back so I asked, "Why did you chuckle? Was it because of me?"
I couldn't hold it back so I asked, "Why did you chuckle? Was it because of me?"
She smiled...a wide smile and I saw her set of teeth. Gosh! They were perfectly chiseled and snow white but she had dark gums...they fit her nicely anyway. Slowly, I started taking in her features. Her eyes were slanted towards the lateral ends, as though they wanted to meet the brows.... the so-called cat eyes I guessed, except that hers were white. Her nose was flat...the flattest I had ever seen. Funny enough, she had tiny blubbery lips that stood sentry to her white giant teeth...odd combination. She was a dark version of mongoloid. The summation is that she was a beautiful dark-skinned girl although that wasn't not the first thing you noticed about her. The first thing would be her wide waist, which I would later appreciate as she alighted from the bus. But when you took your time to stare....her beauty began to appear visible.
"Don't you think it's funny to be taking a selfie in an environment like this?" she replied.
"Awwww...I guess we have our reasons for everything we do. I am taking the selfie so I can show my friends on chat that I am en route my NYSC camping..."
"Awwww...I guess we have our reasons for everything we do. I am taking the selfie so I can show my friends on chat that I am en route my NYSC camping..."
"You are going to NYSC camp too?" She interrupted.
"Yes..."
"Me too!" She exclaimed. "Which state of deployment? "
"Delta State" I responded.
"No! No way!!!"
Before I knew what was happening, she flung her hands around me in a 90º hug.
"Thank God, I was wondering how I was going to cope for the next three weeks...a place where I know no one. This can't be a coincidence."
Before I knew what was happening, she flung her hands around me in a 90º hug.
"Thank God, I was wondering how I was going to cope for the next three weeks...a place where I know no one. This can't be a coincidence."
It was a 'eureka" moment for her. I found it weird though that she was so excited. Don't get me wrong, I was happy to discover we were headed for the same destination where we would remain confined for the next 21 days, but hey! That hug overrated the entire encounter. She sounded clingy (here I go again. ...being a judge! Or don't you think so?). Whatever, I like her anyway; if she is needy let her be...at least someone would finally be needing me in their life.
So our discussion took another dimension. We began from "What is your name? Which higher institution did you graduate from? Did you influence your posting?..."...and went on and on. We chattered endlessly and laughed like we knew from long ago.
Our bus went on to Delta state...our hopes rising with each forward step, our expectations and anticipation swelling. And as I looked out of the window unto the seemingly moving trees and buildings...I knew I had embarked on a journey of discovery...to discover a lot of things and a lot of people...including this lady called Beatrice. And if Fate was kind enough, I would discover myself too.
My name is Uloma.
My name is Uloma.
2. THE ARRIVAL
1. INTRO | 2. THE ARRIVAL | 3. FRESHEST OTONDO | 4. CAMP CALVARY | 5. THE SHOCK |
6. CONFUSION | 7. DISCOVERY BEGINS | 8. EXPLOSIVES
And then, quite without warning, the bus came to a halt. The driver stepped down and went behind the vehicle to empty his bladder. As passengers began getting down from the bus as well, I and Beatrice stared in confusion. I tapped the woman in front of me,
"Is this the last bus stop, Ma?" She didn't say a word, didn't even so much as acknowledge my presence or question with any kind of head movement. So I waited for the driver to return, as soon as he did, I called out to him.
"Sir, you said you would reach Koka bus stop...."
"My friend get down from this bus, e be like say you wan make I carry you go my house baa?"
He turned on the ignition, threatening to take us to his house if we did not alight pronto.
He turned on the ignition, threatening to take us to his house if we did not alight pronto.
"Beatrice, abeg come make we dodge wahala, some people are just mobile missiles waiting to explode..."
"Uloma, wait first." Beatrice said. "Driver come down, come open your boot make we carry our bags. Who you come dey do that 'gragra' for?..."
Here was I thinking she was merely a village champion. There's definitely a lot to unravel about this here Beatrice.
Here was I thinking she was merely a village champion. There's definitely a lot to unravel about this here Beatrice.
The driver hesitantly turned the ignition off before going to open the trunk of his weary creaky bus.
"Your Papa there! Na you I go dey do gragra for? U no reach! I no see better pikin them, na una. See as una be, ashewos! Abegi come carry your yeye bags..."
He went on blabbing. I was annoyed. How could this total stranger call us - call me - a prostitute without even knowing a thing about me. I however restrained myself from going into a verbal exchange. This devil must get behind me I prayed, and it did, as soon as I managed to keep my mouth shut.
He went on blabbing. I was annoyed. How could this total stranger call us - call me - a prostitute without even knowing a thing about me. I however restrained myself from going into a verbal exchange. This devil must get behind me I prayed, and it did, as soon as I managed to keep my mouth shut.
"You said you know Asaba very well, How do we get a bus to Issele-Uku from here?" Beatrice asked me.
"Don't worry, I have a few friends around here. One of them is coming to drive me down to camp and you will join us. Let me dial his line."
"You are a beautiful woman, Uloma"
For a moment, I forgot I was going to make a phone call and just stared blankly at my companion. "Beatrice!!! That's not what we're talking about now!'
"Is he your date? Like your boyfriend? I mean the guy coming to pick you..."
"No! Just a friend!"
"Well it's not surprising that a man would want to leave all he's got doing to drive you down to Issele-Uku. I envy you..."
"Stop Tricey," That would be the first time I called her a pet name. For a moment, that realization, and the fact that I used it without even thinking about it first gave me pause. Then... "you too are a pretty woman."
Fast forward to an hour later, we arrived Issele-uku thanks to my naira-loaded, tall-dark-and-handsome friend, Jachike; who drove us down in his car after giving us a superb lunch at Banyard Eatery.
When Jachike helped me carry my bag to the camp gate, the officers at the gate mistook him for my husband and asked, somewhat suggestively I thought, that I give him a hug before he leaves. Well I did give him a hug, but then the fast guy went in for a kiss! Who was ever going to believe we were 'just friends' after this! Not Beatrice, for sure. Her face said as much. But as I looked over Jachike's shoulder at her face, for a fleeting moment, I thought I saw something sweep strangely across her features. I couldn't quite place my finger on what it was, envy perhaps. But it was gone before I could be sure it had been there. Could she have paled so much because she saw me receiving so much attention? Then I mentally kicked myself. I hadn't known the girl for more than a few hours, and here was I being kissed by Jachike and psychoanalyzing a stranger who wanted to be my friend. Chai.
Still, there was something she was masking, something she was hiding. I was sure of it. And I was also sure I wanted to know what it was.
Still, there was something she was masking, something she was hiding. I was sure of it. And I was also sure I wanted to know what it was.
Once inside the compound we were told that there was no going back. We were frisked and our bags were searched. Then we were asked by the military officers to carry our bags on our heads and jog down to the auditorium for registration.
I was aghast. How inconsiderate could these uniformed people be! How inhumane! Carry a heavy bag on my 'naira-drenched' hair-do and jog in front of all those people! No can do! I can't deal!
I was aghast. How inconsiderate could these uniformed people be! How inhumane! Carry a heavy bag on my 'naira-drenched' hair-do and jog in front of all those people! No can do! I can't deal!
For another reason, that was an impossible feat for me. I couldn't even lift my bag, never mind jogging with it for over 200 metres. Don't blame me please. If I was going to stay in some hell-hole in God-knows-where for three good weeks, I was damn sure going to make it as comfortable as I possibly could. Result of my resolve? My rather substantial-sized bag was rather substantially full - and hardly carry-able.
One of the army officers who apparently noticed my hesitation stomped over to me and made to forcefully place the bag on my head. He did, but my head shook beneath the rather sudden addition of so much weight; the bag was simply too heavy for me. The bag lurched forward. Beatrice saw what was happening and lunged toward me to assist me but she was too late, with her fingers barely touching the flailing straps. The bag fell from my head, eluded her outstretched hands, and landed squarely on the army officer's head, as he was bent over, doing up his bootlaces. Beatrice and I exchanged worried looks. Things were already going badly Yet, in one bizarre corner of my mind, one tiny part of me was also finding all of this hilarious...
I later found out his name. Officer Lawal was our bad start...
3. FRESHEST OTONDO
1. INTRO | 2. THE ARRIVAL | 3. FRESHEST OTONDO | 4. CAMP CALVARY | 5. THE SHOCK |
6. CONFUSION | 7. DISCOVERY BEGINS | 8. EXPLOSIVES
"Are you crazy? Down! Down my friend! Imagine Otondo like you throwing your fowl bag on an officer....a civilian like you abusing a military man! Down!...I mean swat!" the shrill soprano of a female military officer rent the air, as she approached us. As I turned to look at her, the tiny spark of amusement that was fluttering somewhere in the recesses of my brain just died, blown away by the sheer force of the gale of pure terror which replaced it.
Perhaps attracted by her high-pitched voice, other military and paramilitary personnel nearby hurried to where we were standing. I was shaking like a leaf stranded on a bare tree in the face of a harmattan breeze; the tears snaked their way down my cheeks and then dropped to the ground where they glittered in the sunlight before they dried on the coal tar. I looked at Beatrice.
She was clutching my bag, standing still, like a rock, undeterred, unmoved, calm, eyes riveted downward to a point not too far, I guessed, from the boots of the army officer whose head my bag had decided was a fitting landing pad. Reflecting on the events of that evening later, I thought that this lady had guts, and that her guts might yet save us from many dangers. However, on this day, this first day at the NYSC camp, it was my tears that saved us from annihilation. I was sure from the way she was prancing about that the female soldier would gladly have had us lynched for 'assaulting' a military man. My tears and my companion's stoic silence only seemed to add fuel to her fury. As I watched her scream at us through my tears, I thought I noticed some slight amusement on the face of the officer whose head had just been hit. But I wasn't sure about that, couldn't be sure when the female dragon was spitting fire as well as saliva as she threatened us with that shrill soprano. After minutes that seemed like eternity, the soldiers let us go, apparently won over by my innocent tears and the terror that I was sure they could see written all over me in all languages known to man. They even allowed us carry our bags by hand and majestically walk down to the auditorium, with my tears wiped of course, and with my hairdo intact, but with my makeup ruined.
She was clutching my bag, standing still, like a rock, undeterred, unmoved, calm, eyes riveted downward to a point not too far, I guessed, from the boots of the army officer whose head my bag had decided was a fitting landing pad. Reflecting on the events of that evening later, I thought that this lady had guts, and that her guts might yet save us from many dangers. However, on this day, this first day at the NYSC camp, it was my tears that saved us from annihilation. I was sure from the way she was prancing about that the female soldier would gladly have had us lynched for 'assaulting' a military man. My tears and my companion's stoic silence only seemed to add fuel to her fury. As I watched her scream at us through my tears, I thought I noticed some slight amusement on the face of the officer whose head had just been hit. But I wasn't sure about that, couldn't be sure when the female dragon was spitting fire as well as saliva as she threatened us with that shrill soprano. After minutes that seemed like eternity, the soldiers let us go, apparently won over by my innocent tears and the terror that I was sure they could see written all over me in all languages known to man. They even allowed us carry our bags by hand and majestically walk down to the auditorium, with my tears wiped of course, and with my hairdo intact, but with my makeup ruined.
I thought that drama with those uniformed men and woman was an unpleasant experience. That was until it took nearly 24 grueling hours of standing in line, arguing, pushing, and fanning ourselves to get ourselves registered and get our kit of white shirts and knickers as well as khaki clothes. It was during this time that one of the officials getting us registered addressed the officer whose head I would now never forget as Officer Lawal.
Officer Lawal, hmmmmm.
Officer Lawal, hmmmmm.
Done with registration formalities, we changed to our over-sized white shirts, shapeless white knickers, and nondescript footwear. We strolled from the hostel to the mammy market (the only place where a-little-less-discomfort can be bought while in camp) and I had the opportunity to survey what would become my environment for the next 19 days. As I looked at everything I could see, and imagined the ones I could not see, all the pent up frustrations which had been accumulating inside me like molten lava began to slowly erupt to the surface.
"Tricey, here's so ugly, unkempt, overpopulated, under-maintained and...."
"Quit attending to your woes and count your blessings"
"Beatrice biko, don't give me that lecture now. Here's more like a large poultry farm not meant for humans. .. no bathrooms! You can imagine! The hostels are surrounded with bush, mosquitoes everywhere. The annoying part is that some other camps are more comfortable than this..."
This was supposed to be a conversation but, up to this point in my tirade, Beatrice didn't say a word. Intent on getting concurrence from her, I continued,
This was supposed to be a conversation but, up to this point in my tirade, Beatrice didn't say a word. Intent on getting concurrence from her, I continued,
"Well my take is, the National Youth Service Corps should be abolished! This is just unfair to us after the stress of graduating from a higher institution considering the harsh economy of...."
"Quit making noise, Uloma. Life is and will always remain unfair. We often become victims of...."
"How old are you?" I sharply cut in.
Yes. I really had been meaning to find out her age, especially after that unruffled front she put up while I was falling apart in front of those soldiers. But I also really needed to know where that attitude of hers was coming from. Her maturity so far made me feel so juvenile around her; I guess I admired her for it - and I was just a little irritated by it too. Why was she not perturbed? How did she manage to take things perfectly in her stride? Why did I always get this feeling that there hovered around her some kind of mystery?
She chuckled.
Yes. I really had been meaning to find out her age, especially after that unruffled front she put up while I was falling apart in front of those soldiers. But I also really needed to know where that attitude of hers was coming from. Her maturity so far made me feel so juvenile around her; I guess I admired her for it - and I was just a little irritated by it too. Why was she not perturbed? How did she manage to take things perfectly in her stride? Why did I always get this feeling that there hovered around her some kind of mystery?
She chuckled.
"I think that lady officer likes Officer Lawal, she overreacted....."
"But Tricey what has that to do with your age?"
I could sense my irritation with her contaminating my admiration for her, clouding it. Why was she being so elusive?
I could sense my irritation with her contaminating my admiration for her, clouding it. Why was she being so elusive?
"Babe! You are funny. Are you not seeing the correlation already? I noticed her affection for Officer Lawal because I am old enough to hear the unsaid." She laughed.
Who was she laughing with? I thought to myself. Present company definitely not included! In fact, at this point, her maturity was beginning to give me some sort of creepy feeling. So I decided to ignore her. We walked around together without saying a single word until the horn sounded.
Who was she laughing with? I thought to myself. Present company definitely not included! In fact, at this point, her maturity was beginning to give me some sort of creepy feeling. So I decided to ignore her. We walked around together without saying a single word until the horn sounded.
"What's that sound Uloma?" She asked.
So there was something Madam Know-It-All didn't know. How interesting.
"It's the horn" I replied, concentrating on my phone.
"It's the horn" I replied, concentrating on my phone.
"What is it...?" Beatrice started, then broke off in mid-question. I looked up at her and saw her staring straight ahead. I followed her gaze and then saw what made her stop.
Officer Lawal.
"Double up...double up to the parade ground" He shouted.
I would later learn that 'double-up' meant stop walking and start jogging.
Officer Lawal.
"Double up...double up to the parade ground" He shouted.
I would later learn that 'double-up' meant stop walking and start jogging.
At first, I thought Beatrice stopped in her tracks because she was scared of him but when I looked at her more carefully, I knew something was cooking, something more appetizing than fear. I looked at the officer again, and this time I saw not the officer but the man.
He was a handsome man. As he stood across the road from us, arms akimbo, voice barking "double up...double up...", I was able to appreciate his full height, his wide chest built up like a breastplate...with a chest like that, he would not be needing any other shield in a Roman Empire-era battle field. He was neither dark nor light-skinned...somewhere in the middle. His nose was the very opposite of Tricey's own, although I wasn't even sure why I was comparing both noses. He seemed perfectly cut for that uniform and in a way, attractive. And then, there were his eyes.
He was a handsome man. As he stood across the road from us, arms akimbo, voice barking "double up...double up...", I was able to appreciate his full height, his wide chest built up like a breastplate...with a chest like that, he would not be needing any other shield in a Roman Empire-era battle field. He was neither dark nor light-skinned...somewhere in the middle. His nose was the very opposite of Tricey's own, although I wasn't even sure why I was comparing both noses. He seemed perfectly cut for that uniform and in a way, attractive. And then, there were his eyes.
Just then those eyes met mine. He caught me staring. I quickly looked away.
"My Ootondo friend!" He said coming towards us.
"Good evening officer" I and Tricey chorused.
He asked how I was feeling and made jokes about my crying the previous day. From being initially reticent, I gradually relaxed and then, as he joked on, I began to laugh so hard that I didn't even notice when Beatrice left us.
He asked how I was feeling and made jokes about my crying the previous day. From being initially reticent, I gradually relaxed and then, as he joked on, I began to laugh so hard that I didn't even notice when Beatrice left us.
When I caught up with her later on at the parade ground, I said "Hey! Tricey, I didn't even know when you left...Why did you do that?"
She simply brought out her handkerchief and wiped something off my face, whatever it was. Then in a gentle voice, she said, "you're a beautiful woman".
I was speechless. I remembered the first time she said that to me, at Asaba, after we got off that madman's bus. There's something definitely going on with her, something that at the moment remains a secret. Or is it just me thinking so?
I was speechless. I remembered the first time she said that to me, at Asaba, after we got off that madman's bus. There's something definitely going on with her, something that at the moment remains a secret. Or is it just me thinking so?
4. CAMP CALVARY
1. INTRO | 2. THE ARRIVAL | 3. FRESHEST OTONDO | 4. CAMP CALVARY | 5. THE SHOCK |
6. CONFUSION | 7. DISCOVERY BEGINS | 8. EXPLOSIVES
Our gathering at the parade ground on the previous day did not prepare us for what would be awaiting us on the same spot for the rest of our stay in camp. This same parade ground would later be referred to, by our batch of National Youth Service Corp (NYSC) members, as the the Calvary of the camp. A place where we put our lives on the line for a country that we were sure barely deserved it, where we broke a sweat and sometimes shed our blood for people who would not so much as give up their urine for us. Looking at that green mound-dotted mass of land that promised no hospitality, one found the name 'Calvary' most befitting.
This morning, before the cocks began to stir, before the first slivers of light began to pierce the dark skies, we were standing in straight lines at 'Calvary', forming rows and columns that reminded me of those pictures we looked at back in secondary school of WWII soldiers at a parade in Burma. We were arranged according to our platoons, another military term that underlined how closely our lives would be interwoven with those of soldiers for the time being. But as I stood there, stiff, straight, staring unseeingly at the back of the head of the person in front of me, I wasn't thinking of military victories.
I was thinking of Beatrice; I was wondering what lay behind the mask that I was convinced she wore securely over her true self; and I was wondering how many layers of thickness that mask possessed.
"I like you a lot you know," she had said to me as we laid on our beds the previous night. Her bed was just beside mine, an arrangement we had been lucky to have been able to make for ourselves.
"Why are you telling me that now?" I asked, hoping somewhat fantastically that my words had enough magical potency to force from her an instant and detailed confession of all that was hidden about her, sort of like the mother confessor you know.
"Because I want to give you this very important advice. So I am letting you know beforehand that my intentions for saying what I am about to say, are for good".
There we go again, I thought. That Big Sister attitude.
"OK! Shoot. Bring it on, let me hear you counsellor" I replied, with as much sarcasm as I could muster. It wasn't much, and whatever it was, she didn't seem to notice.
"Well I will do the talking," she said. "Whatever you do with the hearing is up to you..."
I yawned. "Beatrice, stop this and just say whatever it is!"
"OK. Here's it. Be careful the way you flirt with these men and these small guys in camp, even the officers...."
"Where's that coming from, Beatrice!" I was shocked, and the shriek in my voice told the whole story. "Are you saying this because of Officer Lawal...?"
"Can you please leave Lawal out of this conversation," she cut in, and I thought I heard the slightest hint of exasperation in her voice. "It's about Taye. That American-schooled new catch of yours. If you ask my opinion, I think she is too wild for your kind of innocent head."
"Youths obey the clarion call..." For a brief moment, I snapped out of my reverie as the NYSC anthem was intoned and sung by the corps members who were standing around me on Camp Calvary. The camp coordinator had finished droning about something, and now we were going through the rituals that we would repeat every morning for the rest of our stay here. Singing anthems, making pledges, standing in straight lines...
I wasn't sure what surprised me more - what Beatrice said, or the earnestness with which she said it. Clearly, this was very important to her. But I wasn't sure why. Could it be that Beatrice was jealous? Did she perhaps feel Taye was beginning to come between us? But that would be ridiculous, seeing as we only just met yesterday. And then I remembered that I met Beatrice only the day before yesterday as well. And that on that day, she had flung her arms around me in a hug that I had felt at the time was the kind one reserved for long-lost friends... I didn't see anything wrong with Taye. She may be too exposed, she could sometimes be very American, but she was fun to be with. She wasn't some old creepy nun.
And then, there was Tricey's last statement before saying goodnight which got me tossing and turning all through the night. She had said, "you may find me too parenting and all that, but the truth is: if I had anyone who told me these things, I wouldn't have made a wrong choice of friendship that has recently left my life complicated. Well it's just an advice, you decide what to do with it. Goodnight."
While I was trying to decide what to do with it, whatever it was, someone sounded the bugle - indeed, the whole military thing is catching on; I called it a horn before. Now I call it a bugle - and once again, I was jolted out of my thoughts. I looked toward the podium, lit by fluorescent bulbs. The camp commandant had the bugle.
"Pre prettion!" He shouted. And corp members - all of us - stamped our left feet on the ground, standing at attention.
"You will remain in this position. If I catch you standing at ease, I swear you will buy job! If you like, try me...just try me this morning and I will clear your doubt."
Listening to his inflection as he spoke, we needed no further explanation to understand that 'buy job' meant attracting punishment for oneself and that 'clearing our doubt' means carrying out his threats. We all remained at attention until the announcement was over and he called for morning prayers by both the Christian and Muslim representative. I sneaked a peek at my wristwatch whose hands glowed in the dark.
4:30AM.
4:30AM.
And there we would stand, till 7:30AM, learning military salutations, singing the National Anthem and the NYSC Anthem afresh; and swearing to serve Nigeria under the sun and in the rain. As I plodded through the bore and tedium that was the morning parade, my thoughts returned to Beatrice.
What did she mean when she said her life was complicated? The young lady I had so far seen seemed to have it all held together in one piece. Keeping an eye out for the soldier who was supervising my platoon, I discreetly turned my head, eyes roving until they rested on her where she was standing, tall and staright, stiff as a rod. She was standing three columns away from myself, attentively following the commands coming from the podium, saluting and halting as instructed, in the intense manner that I had come to know was typical of her. She looked so determined. The same look she had whenever she set out to preach to Corp members in camp.
What did she mean when she said her life was complicated? The young lady I had so far seen seemed to have it all held together in one piece. Keeping an eye out for the soldier who was supervising my platoon, I discreetly turned my head, eyes roving until they rested on her where she was standing, tall and staright, stiff as a rod. She was standing three columns away from myself, attentively following the commands coming from the podium, saluting and halting as instructed, in the intense manner that I had come to know was typical of her. She looked so determined. The same look she had whenever she set out to preach to Corp members in camp.
I didn't mention that? My bad. She would come and gist me how the power of God was greatly manifest in her encounters with each of the corpers she met, then we would pray together. She was largely the reason why I still felt God's presence here in camp. What then, I wondered, was that wrong decision that still weighed her down? That decision that gave her eyes this faraway look that seemed laden with unexpressed emotions? Whatever it was, I was sure it would gradually unfold. I hoped it did.
"Uloma!" Someone tapped me from the back, disengaging me from my thoughts again. "You can stand at ease now. We are done standing at attention. It is workout time"
I turned. Taye.
I turned. Taye.
"Hey girl, where have you been" I asked, imitating her American accent.
"Been looking for you like forever" she replied casually in the African-American way. "Ain't you tired yet?"
"Taye, tiredness is an understatement"
"Then I have got a plan that will get us out of here..."
"Taye, we can't get out of here with all this uniformed people walking around," I protested.
"Babe trust me naaa," she cooed as we walked toward a cluster of trees whose shade looked promising. "You're just going to fall down and I will rush you to the clinic. I will simply cross my legs against yours to make you fall and you will fall right away, landing softly. When you fall, just remain still, hold your breath and shut your eyes tight. Leave the rest of the drama for me."
Before I could fully process her "plan" in my head, and my role in it, she casually put a leg out, just in front of my legs as I walked. I tripped over her outstretched limb and fell. There was nothing soft about that fall. I landed with the back of my head.
Stars glittered for less than a second. Then all was blackness.
Stars glittered for less than a second. Then all was blackness.
5. THE SHOCK
1. INTRO | 2. THE ARRIVAL | 3. FRESHEST OTONDO | 4. CAMP CALVARY | 5. THE SHOCK |
6. CONFUSION | 7. DISCOVERY BEGINS | 8. EXPLOSIVES
I thought I heard a voice, faint but audible. I couldn't make out whose voice that was, but I could hear what it was saying. It was a prayer. At first, it felt like a dream but when I heard the 'Amen!', I knew I wasn't dreaming.
The sharp ache that pierced the right side of my head made me aware of my environment. I tried to open my eyes, but my eyelids seemed to have a mind all their own. After what seemed like a herculean effort, I could only get them to open into tiny slits. The brightness of the white light that assaulted my eyeballs meant that, for a while I couldn't see anything. Then, ever so slowly, the white light began to fade, and images began to fall into focus.
I was lying down on what felt like a bed. Someone was seated beside me, although I was yet to get a clear view of who it was. I felt someone take my hand in theirs and hold it. The person's hands were warm, soft, trembling. I opened my mouth to speak, to call out to the person. No sound came, not even a whimper. The effort to speak was more than I could muster. For a moment, I felt like I was imprisoned in my own self.
Just then, the figure sitting beside me on the bed came closer and bent over my face. The closer the face came to mine, the more familiar it looked to me. The person took their hands off mine and held my head instead. At first, it was a firm grip, but then it softened into a series of repetitive up and down strokes, and then it became a caress. It felt good.
The face moved closer still, till our faces were barely a breath apart. The picture became clear. Beatrice.
And then, before I could call out her name, her head closed in on mine, something liquid dropped on my cheeks. Tears? I felt a wet mound of flesh cover my lips. It felt warm. In the fuzzy universe that was my brain, it took a while before I could figure out what actually happened.
She kissed me.
She kissed me.
I struggled to open my eyes beyond the tiny slits. Then I heard the door open. Footsteps. Plates clattered on the floor. Something broke. The wet warm lips broke off their invasion and freed mine. My eyes fluttered open and I took in my surroundings.
I appeared to be lying on some sort of hospital bed, perhaps the one at the camp clinic. A treatment tray was lying on the floor. Beside it, torn and with its liquid contents spilled everywhere, was an infusion pack on whose body the words DEXTROSE were boldly printed. Several paraphernalia of medicos lay haphazardly on the floor. I took all that in and then looked up at the figures standing around me. There was the corps member who was a nurse, the other corps member who was a doctor, the Officer Lawal. All standing still, all staring at me, their expressions wooden.
Beatrice! She kissed me!! On impulse I looked away from them and unto the floor. I felt my heart drum rapidly, painfully against my chest.
Beatrice! She kissed me!! On impulse I looked away from them and unto the floor. I felt my heart drum rapidly, painfully against my chest.
And then, once again, all dissolved into blackness.
"Nothing is going on, sir..." Dr Damilola began.
"We saw Beatrice..." the nurse, Angela interrupted. She looked like she had information she wanted to give out and would burst if she didn't spill right away.
"...crying...yes," Dr Damilola cut in, and I could imagine him shooting the nurse a dirty look. "You know like tears of joy. We didn't know Uloma would wake so soon." He concluded.
"She's awa..." Angela, the one with the watery tongue, again started, but then, as before, the doctor in shining armour came riding to our rescue.
"It's possible she's drifting in and out of consciousness," he said smoothly. "It's common with head trauma. Considering she landed with her head, everything is possible. However we cannot be entirely sure of the extent of what we have to deal with until she's awake."
"Okay, you do your job," Officer Lawal said and I could hear his tone harden as he moved from concerned gentleman to dutiful soldier. "I am sure you know what to do. If there's anything...any problem, alert me ASAP."
I heard him head for the door. "Beatrice, hope you're no more crying?"
And then I heard the retreating footsteps that I assumed belonged to Tricey and the officer.
I heard Damilola address Angela, "Is there a thermometer there?"
"No, do you need one?"
"Yes please, get me one. I need to check her temperature."
"Relax, you're safe with me. I only want to let you know that I am aware you're awake. So if you please, do us all a favour, and open your eyes..."
"Dami, I am going to leave you to attend to her all by yourself for the time being. So many corps members are being brought in by the Red Cross Team, and we are only two nurses on call," she said.
"Okay, I can handle this," he said evenly. "At least, she is awake now. You have to be smart while attending to those people; many of them are just faking illness so as to be exempt from duties. Also call other nurses in camp to come to the camp clinic ASAP."
"Just to know, it seems like forever. Has anyone aside from Tricey come to see me?"
"Yes, the girl who put you in this condition was here until her case was closed"
"She must have been admiring you from afar when she observed the whole episode. Well, Taye didn't deny the accusation, She was so remorseful and concerned about you that she accepted the whole thing."
"Please..." I began.
"It's an open secret my dear," he said, in that tut-tut voice he had used to cut off Nurse Angela's verbal diarrhea earlier on when Officer Lawal was here. "News of what happened here may not yet have gone round the camp. But the past one week was enough for anyone in camp to know that Tricey is not heterosexual, and that you are her number one choice. That has already gone round the camp. If only Taye had come in here to bid you goodbye at the time that we came to check up on you, she would have gotten the first-hand evidence she needed to back up her own counter-accusations against Beatrice. That way, the both of them would have been decamped; needless to say, you may have followed suit as well."
"Do you feel pain or numbness anywhere? "
How could he be asking? Of course, I feel pain in my heart and my mind is practically numb at the moment.
"No, just headache" I lied.
"OK, I will let you rest, and recuperate. The nurses or myself will be checking on you from time to time but if you have any need for us or if something needs our attention, press the bell beside your bed and someone will be with you in a jiffy."
He turned to leave. I wanted him to leave. My thoughts were crushing me beneath their weight and I needed time to sort them out.
"One more thing Uloma. You may not be the most beautiful and attractive female corp member in this camp but you definitely have your own share of blessings."
He paused a little as though building up courage before adding,
"I do not see any reason why you should succumb to lesbianism. You should think about how miserable this choice would make your life. In the long run, every woman longs for her own man. Most importantly, I think it's my Christian duty to tell you the truth."
With that, he walked out of the room.
6. CONFUSION
1. INTRO | 2. THE ARRIVAL | 3. FRESHEST OTONDO | 4. CAMP CALVARY | 5. THE SHOCK |
6. CONFUSION | 7. DISCOVERY BEGINS | 8. EXPLOSIVES
Maybe I wasn't gone for long, because I heard Officer Lawal ask "what's going on here? Why are you all not moving?"
He probably didn't see what happened. That was a relief.
He probably didn't see what happened. That was a relief.
"Nothing is going on, sir..." Dr Damilola began.
"We saw Beatrice..." the nurse, Angela interrupted. She looked like she had information she wanted to give out and would burst if she didn't spill right away.
"...crying...yes," Dr Damilola cut in, and I could imagine him shooting the nurse a dirty look. "You know like tears of joy. We didn't know Uloma would wake so soon." He concluded.
Did the doctor not see Beatrice kiss me? Or was he being considerate enough to cover us up? Could it be that it was Angela who saw us and in shock, let the tray slip from her hands and come crashing to the floor? Questions and what if's kept popping up in my head. I shut my eyes tight, willing myself to sleep, hoping the others thought I was asleep.
I was not sure I was ready to this new reality yet. I wasn't even sure I knew what this new reality was. The confusion came without warning. How could I open my eyes and mind to the fact that a lady who had been my spiritual backbone, the puritan who warned me to be of good virtue, to desist from bad company and habits, the very lady that was shaking the NYSC camp with one-on-one evangelism, the one everyone called Sister Beatrice because of her perceived moral pedigree, how could it be that it was the same lady who stroked and caressed me in ways that evoked more sensuality than piety. The same woman who placed that sumptuous kiss on my hapless lips. No! That reality was better kept a blink away. No matter what anyone said or did, I would keep my eyes shut until I was ready to come to terms with all this drama, until I was ready to quell the civil war going on in my head and calm the tempest ravaging my heart.
I was not sure I was ready to this new reality yet. I wasn't even sure I knew what this new reality was. The confusion came without warning. How could I open my eyes and mind to the fact that a lady who had been my spiritual backbone, the puritan who warned me to be of good virtue, to desist from bad company and habits, the very lady that was shaking the NYSC camp with one-on-one evangelism, the one everyone called Sister Beatrice because of her perceived moral pedigree, how could it be that it was the same lady who stroked and caressed me in ways that evoked more sensuality than piety. The same woman who placed that sumptuous kiss on my hapless lips. No! That reality was better kept a blink away. No matter what anyone said or did, I would keep my eyes shut until I was ready to come to terms with all this drama, until I was ready to quell the civil war going on in my head and calm the tempest ravaging my heart.
Officer Lawal moved closer and reached for my hand. "You said she was awake, but she's obviously asleep"
"She's awa..." Angela, the one with the watery tongue, again started, but then, as before, the doctor in shining armour came riding to our rescue.
"It's possible she's drifting in and out of consciousness," he said smoothly. "It's common with head trauma. Considering she landed with her head, everything is possible. However we cannot be entirely sure of the extent of what we have to deal with until she's awake."
"Okay, you do your job," Officer Lawal said and I could hear his tone harden as he moved from concerned gentleman to dutiful soldier. "I am sure you know what to do. If there's anything...any problem, alert me ASAP."
I heard him head for the door. "Beatrice, hope you're no more crying?"
"No, sir" she replied. It was muted, little more than a whisper, loaded with what I felt was despair.
Something inside me recoiled and I felt a new sense of foreboding. This was the first time since we met that I heard Tricey speak with such vulnerability in her voice.
As though Lawal came to the same realization, he said,
"Come Beatrice, come. You need some air. The doctor and nurse can take care of her. Come with me and get something to eat."
Something inside me recoiled and I felt a new sense of foreboding. This was the first time since we met that I heard Tricey speak with such vulnerability in her voice.
As though Lawal came to the same realization, he said,
"Come Beatrice, come. You need some air. The doctor and nurse can take care of her. Come with me and get something to eat."
And then I heard the retreating footsteps that I assumed belonged to Tricey and the officer.
I heard Damilola address Angela, "Is there a thermometer there?"
"No, do you need one?"
"Yes please, get me one. I need to check her temperature."
I heard the door close behind Angela as she left. Then I sensed, rather than heard Dr. Dami come closer to my bed. I could perceive the cologne he was wearing as he approached, could perceive him leaning over my face. I felt a rush of blood to my face. I held my breath, with my treacherous heart drumming faster, louder, skipping beats. I shut my eyes all the tighter, while waiting in anticipation for whatever it was he was up to. Was another kiss coming, I wondered.
As though reading my mind, Dr. Dami whispered into my ear:
"Relax, you're safe with me. I only want to let you know that I am aware you're awake. So if you please, do us all a favour, and open your eyes..."
My eyes flew open. Not out of obedience but surprise!
1. INTRO | 2. THE ARRIVAL | 3. FRESHEST OTONDO | 4. CAMP CALVARY | 5. THE SHOCK |
6. CONFUSION | 7. DISCOVERY BEGINS | 8. EXPLOSIVES
The door opened and Nurse Angela walked in.
"Dami, I am going to leave you to attend to her all by yourself for the time being. So many corps members are being brought in by the Red Cross Team, and we are only two nurses on call," she said.
Something about her body language showed that she clearly didn't want to be in that room. Perhaps not with me inside it. She avoided looking at me. Not that I would have been glad to have our stares lock but I found her behaviour absolutely strange. Even when she handed the thermometer to Dr Damilola, there was a certain stiffness about her carriage that was unnatural, that seemed to represent barely contained rage. Or maybe disgust.
Taking in Dr. Dami's facial expression, I was sure he felt the same way. His arched brows, wrinkled forehead showed his bemusement.
"Okay, I can handle this," he said evenly. "At least, she is awake now. You have to be smart while attending to those people; many of them are just faking illness so as to be exempt from duties. Also call other nurses in camp to come to the camp clinic ASAP."
"Yes Sir" she quipped, at the same time performing a mock salute. She left the room. She did not slam the door after her. I was almost sure she would.
This puzzle is getting more confusing, I thought. Could it be that Nurse Angela didn't see us? Or was she behaving awkward because she saw Beatrice do the forbidden? If she did, then why hadn't she reacted as I had expected she would? Like make snide remarks or something like that.
Damilola's cold hands jolted me out of my thoughts as he felt my body temperature.
"I think your temperature is running high," he said before inserting the thermometer in my armpit. "Hold the thermometer tightly in place, it will tell us exactly how high your temperature is".
While he talked I watched his mouth move. In spite of myself, I began to notice that his lips were are so properly shaped, so inviting. His nose was pointed, almost aquiline, not out of proportion with the rest of his nicely chiseled facial features. His cute eyes with their intense brown pupils seemed to bore through my chest as he checked, then adjusted the position of the thermometer. I looked at his face again while avoiding his eyes; I realized he was absolutely handsome with that neatly trimmed beard and a mustache that evidently got plenty of attention. If the controversial kiss had been from him, it would have been a holy sacrilege.
I realized he had been talking to me although I had not heard a word. I was so engrossed in the ramblings going on within my own head. Despite not hearing all he said, I muttered a barely audible 'thank you' when I perceived he was finished, all the while keeping my eyes riveted on a spot on the ceiling.
As he took away his thermometer, frowned at it and then moved away from me, my thoughts shifted to Taye. The heartless hag had not even bothered to pay me a visit! She bore primary responsibility for putting me in this condition that had complicated my life. And now she didn't even have the decency to show up and try to control the damage she had caused. Beatrice warned me anyway.
As he took away his thermometer, frowned at it and then moved away from me, my thoughts shifted to Taye. The heartless hag had not even bothered to pay me a visit! She bore primary responsibility for putting me in this condition that had complicated my life. And now she didn't even have the decency to show up and try to control the damage she had caused. Beatrice warned me anyway.
I turned to the doctor as he was bent over on his table, writing his notes. "How long have I been here?"
He looked up. I picked a point on the wall behind his left ear and fixed my gaze on that. Looking at his eyes was a no-no for me.
He looked up. I picked a point on the wall behind his left ear and fixed my gaze on that. Looking at his eyes was a no-no for me.
"You were unconscious for a few hours. You have only spent a night here" he answered, and went back to writing. But then he looked up at me again and added, "why do you ask? "
"Just to know, it seems like forever. Has anyone aside from Tricey come to see me?"
"Yes, the girl who put you in this condition was here until her case was closed"
I jerked up and forgot I was trying to not look him in the eye.
"I don't get you please. Taye was here? Why do you think she caused all this? And when you say her case was closed, what are you implying?"
As the questions flew out of my mouth even before they were fully formed in my head, he raised his hands in mock self-defense.
"I don't get you please. Taye was here? Why do you think she caused all this? And when you say her case was closed, what are you implying?"
As the questions flew out of my mouth even before they were fully formed in my head, he raised his hands in mock self-defense.
"One at a time young lady, Your friend Beatrice denounced Taye before the NYSC officials as being responsible for your fall. She claimed she saw Taye put a leg in your path, making you trip over her and fall."
"Oh no!" I exclaimed.
"She must have been admiring you from afar when she observed the whole episode. Well, Taye didn't deny the accusation, She was so remorseful and concerned about you that she accepted the whole thing."
"Poor thing" I thought. In that moment, hearing this about Taye who I had already written off as heartless, I had such a rush of emotions that I did not remember to wonder why he thought Beatrice had been admiring me from afar. A mix of anger, regret, pity, and something else - I wasn't quite sure what - all welled up in my heart.
Dami continued, "Taye's case is closed because she has been decamped. She left the camp this evening."
Decamped. I became speechless. Surely all that talk about being decamped was just one of the many threats by the authorities. Surely, that didn't get to happen to anyone. This had to be a nightmare. I was very sure I was going to wake up from all of this very soon.
Decamped. I became speechless. Surely all that talk about being decamped was just one of the many threats by the authorities. Surely, that didn't get to happen to anyone. This had to be a nightmare. I was very sure I was going to wake up from all of this very soon.
Taye was crazy in the first place but how could Beatrice do this? What was she thinking!
I hadn't been aware that I thought out loud till I heard Dami answer:
I hadn't been aware that I thought out loud till I heard Dami answer:
"She was thinking of you, her sweetheart" Damilola said. And when he said it, his words were so concentrated with sarcasm that the dextrose saline infusion he was putting up for me could have been put to better use diluting his own verbal emissions. But the sarcasm also reminded me of the urgency of my own situation.
"Please..." I began.
"It's an open secret my dear," he said, in that tut-tut voice he had used to cut off Nurse Angela's verbal diarrhea earlier on when Officer Lawal was here. "News of what happened here may not yet have gone round the camp. But the past one week was enough for anyone in camp to know that Tricey is not heterosexual, and that you are her number one choice. That has already gone round the camp. If only Taye had come in here to bid you goodbye at the time that we came to check up on you, she would have gotten the first-hand evidence she needed to back up her own counter-accusations against Beatrice. That way, the both of them would have been decamped; needless to say, you may have followed suit as well."
Dami's words sounded like a boring CNN newscast to me. All that English. He was definitely not talking about me nor someone close to me. The reality was too large for me to grasp. How could I be the only one on the camp who did not know a thing about all these things that had gone round the camp! No! Beatrice wasn't a lesbian, couldn't be a lesbian. She kissed me because, in a moment of weakness, she allowed her over-parenting emotions for me, get the better of her. That argument sounded lame to me but it was easier to believe that than to believe that my bestie of one week was a lesbian and I didn't know. Of course I was not that gullible!
As Dr. Dami examined my head and limbs for the umpteenth time, he asked
"Do you feel pain or numbness anywhere? "
How could he be asking? Of course, I feel pain in my heart and my mind is practically numb at the moment.
"No, just headache" I lied.
"OK, I will let you rest, and recuperate. The nurses or myself will be checking on you from time to time but if you have any need for us or if something needs our attention, press the bell beside your bed and someone will be with you in a jiffy."
He turned to leave. I wanted him to leave. My thoughts were crushing me beneath their weight and I needed time to sort them out.
On reaching the door, he turned the door handle, stood a little while as though in deep thought. Then he turned to me.
"One more thing Uloma. You may not be the most beautiful and attractive female corp member in this camp but you definitely have your own share of blessings."
He paused a little as though building up courage before adding,
"I do not see any reason why you should succumb to lesbianism. You should think about how miserable this choice would make your life. In the long run, every woman longs for her own man. Most importantly, I think it's my Christian duty to tell you the truth."
With that, he walked out of the room.
His words slowly sank in after he left. What an irony! He was busy thinking I was a lesbian and probably judging me for it from his Christian duty pulpit, while I was lying here thinking he was just so cute.
Just how in the world did things get this complicated?
I was woken by the 5AM bugle and the high-pitched voice breezing out of the megaphones mounted at strategic points in camp. The megaphones belonged to the OBS crew. Which reminds me, I had applied to join the Orientation-camp Broadcasting Services, OBS. I even went for the audition. I wonder why they haven't called me up.
"Yes, I am."
"Any pain, headache or dizziness?" Dami said. I thought I saw what looked like wariness mask his features as he used the back of his hand to feel my forehead temperature, then his fingers to feel my pulse.
"Nothing at all, I am fit" I insisted and gave him a big fake smile.
She began to help me out of the bed, and presently, my legs touched the ground. As I tried to stand erect and steady myself, I staggered and stumbled forward. That was all it took to send her straight into emergency mode as she called out for the doctor with all of her lungs. Damilola flew in with the wind to answer her summons. She immediately told him how unfit for discharge she thought I was. He turned to me, eyes dark with concern.
Although she tried to keep her voice neutral, her eyes betrayed her. They darkened with anticipation and with the kind of hunger that I imagined drug addicts would have when suffering from withdrawal symptoms. The raw hunger I saw in those eyes made me cringe inwardly. Was this how badly starved the rumor mill was of raw material for grapevine news? She looked as though she was desperately anticipating that eureka moment when I, in an exclusive interview with her as she walked me back to my hostel, admitted to her that I was a lesbian. Good heavens!!!
Just how in the world did things get this complicated?
8. EXPLOSIVES
1. INTRO | 2. THE ARRIVAL | 3. FRESHEST OTONDO | 4. CAMP CALVARY | 5. THE SHOCK |
6. CONFUSION | 7. DISCOVERY BEGINS | 8. EXPLOSIVES
"Corpers wii, waa! Wii wii Waa waa!! If you're sleeping, you're wrong! If you're not on the parade ground, you're wrong! If you're stepping, you're wrong!"
I was woken by the 5AM bugle and the high-pitched voice breezing out of the megaphones mounted at strategic points in camp. The megaphones belonged to the OBS crew. Which reminds me, I had applied to join the Orientation-camp Broadcasting Services, OBS. I even went for the audition. I wonder why they haven't called me up.
I heard footsteps thudding in time with the rhythm of the words coming from the megaphones. I found myself nodding with the rhythm and soon, I started chanting into the recesses of my pillows, along with the cantor at the megaphones:
Oh, camp life! Camp rhythms! Camp songs!!! The delectable tunes that appealed to my sensibilities, especially the chorus:
Yes, in the orientation camp, this was how our mornings begun; the sounding of the bugle, the hysteria of concluding the very basic morning toilette rituals that our camp conditions allowed us to perform in a time-frame that was nowhere near enough, the thudding footsteps as corps members fled pursuing soldiers as everyone moved to the parade ground, the excitement of it all...that was how our mornings begun, how my mornings begun. How they should have continued to begin.
"Corpers wii, waa! Wii wii Waa waa!! If you're sleeping, you're wrong! If you're not on the parade ground, you're wrong! If you're stepping, you're wrong!"
Oh, camp life! Camp rhythms! Camp songs!!! The delectable tunes that appealed to my sensibilities, especially the chorus:
"If Corper marry Corper they go born better, if Corper marry soldier they go born mumu...".
Yes, in the orientation camp, this was how our mornings begun; the sounding of the bugle, the hysteria of concluding the very basic morning toilette rituals that our camp conditions allowed us to perform in a time-frame that was nowhere near enough, the thudding footsteps as corps members fled pursuing soldiers as everyone moved to the parade ground, the excitement of it all...that was how our mornings begun, how my mornings begun. How they should have continued to begin.
But today, I am starting another bleak day right here in the camp clinic, half-suffocating under the somewhat torrid and very varied smells of methylated spirit and different drugs. These few days here have probably made a doctor out of me. I have picked up vocabulary like febrile, inebriation, toxicity, presenting complaint, diagnosis, plasmodiasis, salmonellosis, cyesis. The smells and the tongue-twisters have all reminded me of all the reasons why being a doctor was never on the cards for me. And now, as I looked around this clinic where I was being "detained", one thing was clear, I was fed up with being here. Fit to go or not, I was "so" leaving this clinic today. I was going to get this place behind me together with all the unpalatable circumstances that transpired here. With the energy that comes from resolve, I reached out and pressed the bell beside my bed.
They both walked in hastily, Damilola looking somewhat harried, and a lady who I guessed was a nurse too, and who, in contrast was looking much more relaxed.
"Good morning Uloma" Dami said. And even though he smiled, I could see the lines and bags that told their story of a night that had not seen much sleep. However, right now, I didn't care about any other person's stress. I cared about mine. And with the amount of stress I was under, there was definitely nothing good about this morning.
"Good morning Uloma" Dami said. And even though he smiled, I could see the lines and bags that told their story of a night that had not seen much sleep. However, right now, I didn't care about any other person's stress. I cared about mine. And with the amount of stress I was under, there was definitely nothing good about this morning.
"The only thing that can be good about this morning is my being discharged from this place..."
The doctor's face lit up. "That's to say that you're feeling alright and stronger this morning?"
"Yes, I am."
"Any pain, headache or dizziness?" Dami said. I thought I saw what looked like wariness mask his features as he used the back of his hand to feel my forehead temperature, then his fingers to feel my pulse.
"Nothing at all, I am fit" I insisted and gave him a big fake smile.
The nurse chuckled "you really want to leave here" she said.
"Yes, because I am fine," I countered. "This place is for sick peo.."
"It's okay, Uloma," soothed Dr Damage-Control Damilola. "Chiemela, tidy her up and sign her off, while I prepare her exemption note. "
With his two thumbs, he gently depressed the eyelids of both my eyes and squinted at God-knew-what for a moment. Then he straightened up.
"I will give you two days of bed rest," he announced to me, with all the solemnity of a judge handing down a sentence. Then he left the room.
With his two thumbs, he gently depressed the eyelids of both my eyes and squinted at God-knew-what for a moment. Then he straightened up.
"I will give you two days of bed rest," he announced to me, with all the solemnity of a judge handing down a sentence. Then he left the room.
With Damilola gone, I turned to the nurse "you are a corps member, right?"
"We all are" she replied. Her lips momentarily thinned out into a plastic smile. That is something else I found out during my pilgrimage to this Clinic. Doctors and nurses should win an award for their ability to effortlessly produce plastic smiles.
She began to help me out of the bed, and presently, my legs touched the ground. As I tried to stand erect and steady myself, I staggered and stumbled forward. That was all it took to send her straight into emergency mode as she called out for the doctor with all of her lungs. Damilola flew in with the wind to answer her summons. She immediately told him how unfit for discharge she thought I was. He turned to me, eyes dark with concern.
"You should stay here a little while..."
"No way Dami, I am so so leaving here..."
"You can barely stand, how will you walk to your hostel?"
"I will help her walk to the female hostel,"
We all turned to the door to see who was applying to become my guardian angel. Nurse Angela. Odd.
We all turned to the door to see who was applying to become my guardian angel. Nurse Angela. Odd.
"But...you are on call...." Chiemela began.
"Yes but I need to get something from the hostel. I was on my way there when I overheard your convo here, so I figured that as I was headed in the same direction, I might be of help." Angela glanced at the doctor, then at me. "If that is OK, of course," she added, with the plastic smile I had come to associate with all of them.
"OK, good" proclaimed Damilola. "That way she will be in safe hands. Ensure you're wearing your tag so you can pass through the soldiers' checks without any hassle."
"OK" Angela responded while taking my hands.
And that was how, an hour and a bath and a breakfast later, I was hobbling my way out of the clinic room where I had spent so many long hours and days and making for my hostel, under the care of my most unlikely guardian angel. And while I was thinking about guardian angels, Beatrice came to mind. Where exactly has she been? True, I was pissed at her but hey, she's supposed to be here helping me...walking me to my hostel was probably a better and more practical and less provocative demonstration of affection than kissing me... I turned to Angela.
"Angela, have you see Tricey of late?"
And that was how, an hour and a bath and a breakfast later, I was hobbling my way out of the clinic room where I had spent so many long hours and days and making for my hostel, under the care of my most unlikely guardian angel. And while I was thinking about guardian angels, Beatrice came to mind. Where exactly has she been? True, I was pissed at her but hey, she's supposed to be here helping me...walking me to my hostel was probably a better and more practical and less provocative demonstration of affection than kissing me... I turned to Angela.
"Angela, have you see Tricey of late?"
And then I wished I hadn't. Somehow, I just felt that this was the wrongest question to have asked the wrongest person hereabouts.
"No! Don't know what she's up to this time." I hated the smirk that I could sense in her tone although it did not show on her face.
As we moved farther away from the clinic, I felt Angela's right hand tighten around my waist. Then she raised my left hand across her shoulders. I looked at her quizzically.
"It's better this way," she explained. "I am just take some of your weight off your feet and support you as well as I can so you can walk easier. This camp should have wheelchairs for these kinds of situations but then, that is Nigeria for you..." her voice trailed off.
Although I was touched by her effort at compassion, somehow it did not ring true. What I felt instead, what I had felt since she had walked into the clinic offering to take me to the hostel this morning, was that she was up to something. That somehow, I was the prey and she the predator in whatever game she was playing, and that she was circling me, measuring me up, waiting for the perfect moment to close in for the kill. Just as I was mentally chiding myself for being so paranoid, she struck.
"It's better this way," she explained. "I am just take some of your weight off your feet and support you as well as I can so you can walk easier. This camp should have wheelchairs for these kinds of situations but then, that is Nigeria for you..." her voice trailed off.
Although I was touched by her effort at compassion, somehow it did not ring true. What I felt instead, what I had felt since she had walked into the clinic offering to take me to the hostel this morning, was that she was up to something. That somehow, I was the prey and she the predator in whatever game she was playing, and that she was circling me, measuring me up, waiting for the perfect moment to close in for the kill. Just as I was mentally chiding myself for being so paranoid, she struck.
"Have you always been her partner?" she asked.
"What...who...?" I was stunned. Although I was sure she was up to something, I sure as hell didn't see that one coming. For a moment, there were no words in my brain. Just wildly flashing tiny light-bulbs silently screaming danger.
"I mean you and Beatrice or whatever it is you call her," she said, her face expressing nothing, her voice with just that hint of sarcasm, and yea, that plastic smile. But somehow, I saw it all now. Her offer to take me to the hostel was just a ploy to get some time alone with me so she could get some raw material for her ever-busy gossip mill. Her concern had not been for me all along, but for her thriving lindaikejism. I straightened off her, my eyes narrowed to slits.
"Angela or whatever you call yourself, if this is why you opted to help me, can you please go back to your call. At least you will be useful there..." my tone could have made hell freeze over in seconds.
Hell didn't freeze over. Angela did. But just as quickly, she shrugged and said, lightly:
Hell didn't freeze over. Angela did. But just as quickly, she shrugged and said, lightly:
"Hey, hey, hey...easy girl, soft pedal. I am not the devil here. I am only trying to help."
She ran her left hand through her hair and then continued:
"I never thought you were a lesbian but I have always known that Beatrice was one. She once made an attempt to seduce me, when she cane to my room in the guise of evangelism.."
I think she noticed that I froze, saw that her revelation had given me pause, because she went on, almost gleefully.
She ran her left hand through her hair and then continued:
"I never thought you were a lesbian but I have always known that Beatrice was one. She once made an attempt to seduce me, when she cane to my room in the guise of evangelism.."
I think she noticed that I froze, saw that her revelation had given me pause, because she went on, almost gleefully.
"You see, that's why I was surprised to see you two kissing. So I began wondering if you're one. Are you?"
Although she tried to keep her voice neutral, her eyes betrayed her. They darkened with anticipation and with the kind of hunger that I imagined drug addicts would have when suffering from withdrawal symptoms. The raw hunger I saw in those eyes made me cringe inwardly. Was this how badly starved the rumor mill was of raw material for grapevine news? She looked as though she was desperately anticipating that eureka moment when I, in an exclusive interview with her as she walked me back to my hostel, admitted to her that I was a lesbian. Good heavens!!!
She moved closer to me, running her left hand up and down my left arm which I had since removed from her neck and which was now hanging by my side, where it should always have stayed. I flinched at her touch.
"I understand you even if you do not want to answer me," she cooed in that irritatingly condescending voice weasels like her used when they were trying to prise information from lesser mortals. "I know how difficult it can be to admit such....."
So she thought I was a lesbian! Was this what everyone on camp thought of me now? How exactly was I going to cope with this for the next one week and probably afterwards? And all of this because of that ridiculous kiss from Beatrice! Beatrice!!! How could I not have known you were a wolf in sheep's clothing? How could I have been so blind? No. It couldn't be. This couldn't be true about Beatrice. This despicable nurse was making things up, had to have been making things up. God I can't deal with this.
I could feel the tears welling up within me. All of a sudden I wanted to cry long and hard, to shed all the tears that I could till there were none left to shed, and then to shed some more...But I would not give this gorgon the opportunity to see those tears, or to see that her words had affected me. Not on my life.
"That will be all, Nurse Angela. I can take care of myself from here. Do not bother to continue following me, dear. The reason I have two days' bed rest is so I don't have to put up with the sort of gibberish you seem to be interested in peddling at the moment."
"I understand you even if you do not want to answer me," she cooed in that irritatingly condescending voice weasels like her used when they were trying to prise information from lesser mortals. "I know how difficult it can be to admit such....."
So she thought I was a lesbian! Was this what everyone on camp thought of me now? How exactly was I going to cope with this for the next one week and probably afterwards? And all of this because of that ridiculous kiss from Beatrice! Beatrice!!! How could I not have known you were a wolf in sheep's clothing? How could I have been so blind? No. It couldn't be. This couldn't be true about Beatrice. This despicable nurse was making things up, had to have been making things up. God I can't deal with this.
"That will be all, Nurse Angela. I can take care of myself from here. Do not bother to continue following me, dear. The reason I have two days' bed rest is so I don't have to put up with the sort of gibberish you seem to be interested in peddling at the moment."
I felt cruel as I delivered that speech in as cold and as regal a manner as I could muster. I saw shock and disbelief colour her features but I was too full of my own problems to be bothered by whatever my words were doing to her. After all, as far as I was concerned, she was easily the enemy. All she was looking to get from me was the noose with which she would hang me and then applaud herself for being such an artistic hangman. And to think I had thought of this bitch as my guardian angel!
I looked at Angela one last time, and staggered away.
***
NB: We will not be posting any more updates to this story on this blog. Further updates can be found on the author's Facebook Wall. Happy reading.
____________________________________
Explore Naijaman
I looked at Angela one last time, and staggered away.
***
NB: We will not be posting any more updates to this story on this blog. Further updates can be found on the author's Facebook Wall. Happy reading.
____________________________________
Explore Naijaman
